Snack

| June 8th, 2010 | .Cells, .Gels, .Tubes, 8-bit, Animals Hunting Humans, Guessers, Portfolio 2

Whose hungry for something disgusting?

Scooner

| May 18th, 2010 | .Tubes, Portfolio 2, Probably WMDs, Weather as Conversation

“You dumb bastard. It’s not a schooner… it’s a sailboat.”

Virgin Queen

| April 27th, 2010 | .Tips, Commissions, FOR SALE, Portfolio 2, Probably WMDs

Stacie commissioned this virgin symbol, the one that we use to note virgin female fruit flies.  There is no symbol for non-virgin females, because when they’re discovered, they’re burnt at the stake!  Eeek!  Seriously though, we smash them or drown them in alcohol.  Cause their spawn are tainted by lame dudes.  It’s also the symbol of Queen Elizabeth the Hackney-eyed, commonly known as A Virgin Queen.  Little known fact: she was actually a virgin.  : [

[SOLD. Commission a reproduction for $50.]

DarkNight

| April 6th, 2010 | .Tubes, 10,000ft, 8-bit, Animals Hunting Humans, Portfolio 2, Probably WMDs

OMG, I get it!

Brella

| January 8th, 2010 | .Tubes, Portfolio 2, Weather as Conversation

bella

This is an umbrella.  You can tell because it has a curved bottom.

Funny Joke

| July 31st, 2009 | .Tips, 10,000ft, Portfolio 2, Probably WMDs

Peasants and workers of the world unite!  Just kidding.

VWOOOIP!

| May 20th, 2009 | .Tubes, Portfolio 2, Probably WMDs, Robots, TV Shows Set in Space, Utter Disappointment

Basestar
OMG HOW DO THEY KEEP FINDING US??

Usher

| April 15th, 2009 | .Tips, Portfolio 2

Usher
Art, imitating life, imitating art, imitating usher.

O

| March 17th, 2009 | .Tips, Alphabet Cycle, Portfolio 2, Stop Time

H

| September 17th, 2008 | .Tips, Alphabet Cycle, Portfolio 2

H
No hints this time…this letter is TOP SECRET. I probably shouldn’t even be showing you it. If I disappear under mysterious circumstance in the next few days, the combination to the hamjet is “juicyfriut.” Unlock it and fly to my moon house. Once you’re in the dungeon, look for the spare key to the vault I keep in the iron maiden. Use it. The vault contains — among other treasures — an enormous and ancient tome that details the history of this letter. It’s all a red herring. Scan it into a computer at 300dpi and be sure to line each page up EXACTLY in the corner. Merge the resulting files into a single PDF and open it in in imageJ. It will fail to open and give you a jumble of letters. That is the passkey you need to type into the mirror vault key lock swirl in the bathroom mirror. Once inside, you should drink the vial of rambaldi’s blood you’ve been keeping for just such a case. After you drink, you will collapse for 48 hours. On waking, exhausted and delirious, you will find yourself in a foreign land and faced by an ancient monk who will ask you for a sign. You must immediately begin fighting him to the death. As he feels his last breaths approaching he will beg you stop and will reveal to you the identity of the letter. And then he will die. After that, feel free to use the hamjet at your leisure.