Flavor blasted.

[Available, $50.]

Whoomp whoomp whoomp!  Party time!  Kick in the head!!

Andrew said to me, “I need something for my wall that will let everyone know how rich and powerful I am.” Of course I immediately suggest he nail-gun up $100 bills, but it turns out he’s not actually rich.  So, a relic from the TipArt Fortress/Studio seemed like a good second best.  I showed him my FOR SALE list, but he spit on it and said, “only the most custom objects are fit for my gruesome lair.”  Whatever.  After that we discussed his deepest desires, and I went to work.  In the studio I spun around, struck a fancy pose, and THIS sprang whole from my head.  Good enough.

[SOLD.  Commission a reproduction for $50.]

Here’re some blue berries for ya.  Don’t see it?  Stay tuned.

Remember when Margaret used sorcery and legal tender to commission an Apple?  And then later that worthless Dolphin King attacked my son and in the course of rescuing him — and then killing the King in cold blood — I made a Banana and pawned it off on her as an original work?  Well, I pulled it off again with these Cherries.  Sucker!  What do you mean my cost of labor is ¢0.75/hr??  : [  I think I need an adding machine.

[SOLD.  Commission a reproduction for $50.]

In the summer of 2010 a great calm came over the land and then the Dolphin King kidnapped my son and threatened to hand him over to my robot nemesis unless I retreated to my forest forge and fabbed a fabulous framed banana.  I told him it was impossible, but he just let out a blood curdling screech and flew off into the distance.  My first instinct was the send my lieutenant and an expeditionary force to burn his pitiful fort to the ground, but they were immediately ambushed and slaughtered.  So I went to work with hammer and sickle and low!, this finished and sublime product sprang whole from the side of my head.  Good enough.  I traded it for my son, and the second I had him back I broke my promise and killed the Dolphin King where he stood, cause I don’t eff around.  Then Margaret commissioned a banana and I pretended to work on it for two months so that she didn’t realize I had already made it for another purpose.  And I got away with it, like I always do!  Zooooooooom!

[SOLD. Commission a reproduction for $50.]

He loves me, he loves me not

Feed me pls.

This is another apple.

[SOLD. Commission a reproduction for $50.]